Again...I just need you to stop being nice to me unless you're gonna marry me

Ya'll.

This boy is gonna be the death of me.

The death of me.

Last night was the YL Tailgating at the hs football game. Since he tends to fall off the face of the earth at times, I wasn't really expecting him to come. Since I'm 32 and single and have been for roughly 49 years, I put makeup on and did my hair, just in case.

And, he came.

And we picked up right where we left off. Flirting and laughing. Joking and talking. Asked again if we were married or just dating. And I didn't have a clever response waiting. Later on in the evening, when he joked about us dating, I didn't have a clever response. A stupid giggle- that I had at the ready. A clever response...that came to me this afternoon.

This guy makes me laugh a lot. And twice, he put his arm around me. Once for the dating joke, and once as a demonstration that could have been done (I think) without his hugging me. What's that about?

It's just a silly crush and I'm trying not to be a girl about this. I'm trying not to analyze everything he said, or get my hopes up, or believe some of the lies being thrown my way by The Villain. I'm also trying to remember that he's a boy so he's not going to look at the situation in the same way I am, so I need to be patient and wait.

But I am a girl nonetheless. And I do think about these things. So, ideally, I need him to stop being nice to me unless he's going to marry me. Is that too much to ask?!

On a serious note, I am praying that either he will man up and ask me out on a date for as long as we both shall live, or...well, I'm still working on that part. I have an 'or' in my head and in my prayers...it's just hard to put it into words.

I'm going to go write about that last part in my journal now, and try very hard not to put hearts around his name or write my last name with his. Though it would have a nice ring to it...