Friday, November 14, 2014

Prophet of BOOM

I'll have you know that I'm breaking my "no computer in bed" rule 
to bring you TWO POSTS IN TWO DAYS! 
(This one with GIFs!)

I'm still skating The Derby (roller, not Kentucky), 
and while my skills have advanced somewhat, 
I still look a little like this:

I'm in a new group, which is technically called Group 2,
but I prefer to call it Group 1 and a half, or Group 2ish.

Group 2 is exponentially better, because it does not revolve around 
safety falls. Meaning, we don't fall down and get up 
a hundred thousand times per practice. 

While Group 1 is all about safety and falling without injuring yourself,
Group 2 is all about building new skills. 
Like crossovers. They are not easy, 
and mine currently resemble this:
We still work on stops, which again, for me looks like this:
Our coaches/trainers like to teach us some fancy footwork 
and do drills that involve cones and weaving and bobbing and 
strategery and the likes. They calmly and clearly explain them to me. 
And I look at them like this:
But nonetheless, I get out there and try my hardest to 
wrap my brain around what they expect us to do. 
Which means I look a little like this:
Then, somehow, magically, I turn around mid-skating and don't fall
and don't flail my arms or injure myself, and I totally embrace the victory:
But the real kicker is that Group 2 is not just about skills. 
It's about this little personal hell concept called Endurance. 

We have to get our stamina up to achieve the magic numbers: 
27/5. 
Twenty-seven laps skated in five minutes. 
Do you know how long five minutes is on skates? 
It's a LONG A$$ TIME. 

Especially for someone who is not going to get to 
twenty-seven laps anytime soon. 
So, my goal is just getting better each time. 

The first time: 10 in about 2 1/2. Couldn't skate the whole time. 
Why? After ten laps, I was all:
As with many athletes, the problem is between my ears and not in my legs, 
so for my second time around, my goal was 11, and I got 15. 
Woo hoo! I increased 5 laps! 
And I didn't die. 

But I'm getting stronger now, and even wearing the sassier pants
(as Reckless would say) (Don't tell her they're just from Old Navy). 
During one hot streak of five practices without skipping one, 
I even made it to 19 laps in 5 minutes. 
That left me feeling like:
with a side dish of...
I've also started attending Saturday morning practices. 
Since I'm in group 2, I should probably go to practice 
at least two times a week. 
Saturday practices are hard. 
Getting up and at the rink and in 
gear and warming up by 9am? 
Awesome.
Then, we do drills. Footwork. 
And sometimes, that endurance hell I mentioned. 
Afterwards? For the rest of the day Saturday? 
This is about where I'm at:
   So, yeah. I'm still doing the derby, and loving every minute of it. 
The post title? That's my derby name. 
It was given to me by Reckless. 
I could not for the life of me come up with a name, 
but I didn't stress at all, knowing it would come to me. 

And it did. 
Reckless calls me Prophet 
(which I love, because if this whole derby things doesn't work out, 
I can start a small, fundamentalist cult)
My wife (Derby, not Sister) calls me BOOM. 
So I'm still working on that. 

There's one little problem with working on The Derby so much nowadays. 
The smell of my gear after practice:

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Long story... involves the dog.

I guess I should post before November is clear over.
Especially since a member of my Most Awesome Bobsled Team insisted that I do so on my day off.

So I decided had to take a day off today, and in order to do that I have to fill out a form for my principal listing the reason I'm taking the day off. I listed "long story... involves the dog." And it's true.

I live in an apartment, so they are constantly having to come in and fix this or that or check this or that, and it's so much more than just a little annoying. And I have to make arrangements for The Dog Who Will Not Be Confined To A Crate Thankyouverymuch. So I typically take her to the Groomer, or the Parents, or even doggy day care.

Long story short- she didn't have her vaccines up to date, meaning the groomer and day care were out of the question. I could get the Parents or a friend to watch her, but instead I decided to take the day off, and it may very well be the best decision I've made in a long time!

I slept in (until 7:00), and got a few things done around the house.
Daisy and I both needed some shots, so we got those. I am now protected from The Flu and Daisy is now protected from The Rabies.

I stayed in sweats and layers almost all day, snuggled up on the couch.

It was bliss.

Playing hooky- totally worth it.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Scenes from a weekend

Relaxing weekend. 

What Daisy did all weekend:

Friday night:

After getting her hair did:

All. Weekend:

I watched a little derby via The Interwebs:

I may have joined her a time or two:

There was a carnival with some silly string aimed directly at my face...
(Don't even get me started about this)

She actually rode in my lap shotgun most of the weekend...

She wasn't too thrilled with my constant photographing:

Seriously. All. Weekend. Long

I love being able to put my computer onto my tv and 
being able to watch derby in Washington from my own living room.

Not much time to write lately, but this is what the weekend looked like...

Sunday, October 12, 2014

The Beauty of Getting Older

While the title may lead you to think that this post will be waxing poetic about aging gracefully, but it is not.

Last night/this morning, I discovered yet another beauty of getting older:
getting to have wonderful hangovers without the pesky trouble of drinking and/or partying the night before.

As it is even now, at almost 7pm on Sunday night, I'm not sure I'm going to make it to watch Once Upon a Time before falling asleep on the couch.

The story: KC, my BFF and teaching partner-in-crime, went to visit her college peeps out of town for the weekend. The problem? Her husband works Saturday nights as a valet to make a little extra dough. So, I agreed to take the chilrens to a movie (Boxtrolls!) and then bring them home and put them to bed.

We watched the Boxtrolls, which was just quirky enough for me to love, and then came home. After a smidge of a squalling fit (the girl's got stamina...), the littles watched approximately five minutes of Frozen before falling asleep. Put them to bed, and then pass out on their couch.

Which is what I did. I slept on their couch from 11-2:45. Then, I woke up, went home, and slept in my own bed from 3:30-7:30. So, all in all, I got almost eight hours of sleep.

And woke up feeling like I'd partied like a rockstar and had about a case or twelve of something alcoholic.

Ah, aging... it is a many splendored thing. I'm just going to go pound the tums I've required to be near me since I turned 35.

Can't wait to see what 40 holds...

Monday, October 06, 2014

Conversations with my sister

I am up way past my bedtime- past even my derby bedtime- to bring you this blog post. I have to ice my knee down for about 20 minutes, so I'm even breaking the no electronics (save iPad reading) in bed to tell you about a few conversations with my sister.

For your enjoyment:

The Sister and I have been spending some time together lately, which has led to two very amusing conversations. Amusing as in "I can't make this $%!t up."

Episode 1:
On a long drive to East Texas with my mother and my sister, the following conversation happened:
(My mother and my sister work at the same company, and my mother works with someone whose name is pronounced "I-E-da")
Sister: Where is IEda from?
Mom: Bolivia
Sister: No, I think she's Indian
Mom: No, she's from Bolivia. Or maybe Bosnia.
Me: Well, those are two very different places. One is in South America, and one is in Europe.
Sister: Yeah, Mom. GOSH! Bosnia is in South America!
Me: Try again. 
Notes:
1. She's from Bosnia.
2. On this same trip home, The Sister and Her Boyfriend got into a fight over texting and the phone that left her in tears. (Super fun 2-hour ride home.) Throughout this whole crying episode, I could visibly see the thought bubble above my mother's head that said "I am never getting grandchildren."

Episode 2:
(Also titled 'In Which I Almost Smacked My Sister Clear Across The Kitchen')
Big things are happening in the Dallas area, and most of them are virus related.
Sister: Did you SEE on the news the guy here in Dallas with the Ebol-i virus?!?!
Me: You mean Ebola?
Sister: No. Ebol-i. That's how it's pronounced.
Me: No. It's Ebola.
Sister: WHAT ARE YOU?! A DOCTOR? It's PRONOUNCED E-bowl-I. 

I can't make this $%!t up.
Happy night to you all.

Friday, September 26, 2014

Been busy...

Hi.

Been busy.
Been gone.

I have some free time in the near future, and I am determined to get the blog going again. i'm going to really try to get some written and scheduled, so on the days I don't have time to blog, there's still something there.

Topics may include, but will not be limited to:

1. Cast of Characters (It is a new school year, after all...
2. A Student Teacher
3. The First Hissy Fit of the 2013-2014 School Year
4. Five hours in a car
5. My mother, a day off, and then another day off.
6. What is this sleep you speak of?
7. A Sister, her boyfriend, and an impending engagement
8. What's in my bag (derby edition)
9. A Weekend in LBB
10. Littles and tragedy


For now, here's a video of a Great Dane throwing a fit to tide you over until I blog again.

Thursday, August 14, 2014

There were three in the bed and the little one said...

"...get away from me or I will bite your mother-puppin' face off!"

That was Daisy talking. She's got some anger issues. And a pretty salty vocabulary (I shih tzu not.)

Right now, I'm sitting on puppies. Plural. I've done it once before, where I reminded myself why I do NOT want a puppy. 

This time, it's a little different. The family is away, so I'm staying at the house, per the puppy momma's request. I didn't want my parents to have to keep Daisy, especially when I could be in and out, and not at school all day.

So, every night, I bring Daisy over to the house for our evening hang-out time and to sleep. Then, in the morning, we hang out for a few minutes, and then Daisy and I go home and I get ready for the day. During the day, Daisy chills at our place, while the puppies chill at theirs. I go let them out midday, so they get some chill time minus Daisy.

It's a little hectic, but it actually works for now.
Except for one minor detail:
Daisy is terribly bossy, even if it is not her house, her brothers, or her sister.

She's got Alpha Dog syndrome, and it is ridiculous.

Pete only wants to play, but Daisy will have NONE of that tomfoolery. He gets near her, she growls and asserts her bitchiness dominance.

This was the first night, and I don't think I got more than two consecutive hours sleep.

Anytime he would go near her, the growling would start, followed by the barking that scared the bejesus out of me from a dead sleep.

The problem is that Daisy is very used to sleeping nestled up next to me. But Pete? He's used to sleeping snuggled next to his puppy mama also. So she would be asleep, snuggled next to me, and he would snuggle next to me and she'd growl and bark.

A vicious cycle.

By night two, I found a solution. My legs are heretofore known as Switzerland.

Pete climbs up onto the little murphy bed on my left side, and gets nestled into a good sleeping position. Daisy gets the right side. My legs, stretched out down the middle (not, by the way, how I naturally sleep) serve as the border, over which no puppy may cross. Occasionally one (Pete) tries, and I have to lift my leg like I'm doing scissor exercises to keep them on their separate sides.

It's awesome, being the Republic of Switzerland.

I will say, five nights into this endeavor (only three more sleeps Praise Jesus!), a truce seems to be forming, as evidenced by this rare sighting last night:

Harmony.

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