I'm going to need you to relax.

I say that to my kids frequently. Except when I say it, they're usually flipping out, which makes me don a more Southern accent and then it comes out sounding more like "I'm gon need you to relax." Unless you're Jamie, and then it sounds like that except with about 18 more syllables because she thinks I sound a little hillbilly.

Anyways.. I typically say it to them when they are flipping out about something because they don't have all the facts and I need them to pull themselves together long enough for me to get all the facts to them. And when they have pulled themselves together, I tell them why, and they relax and begin to work their way back to the pleasant children I know them to be.

Only now, it's happened to me.
God's been working on teaching me something for a bit of a while now (like...since September or something), and I totally thought I knew what He's doing, and I'm being all understanding and trusting and saying "You're totally right, God. I understand what You're trying to teach me. I get it. "
Only, apparently, I wasn't.

The week before school let out, I had a little bit of a meltdown, in which I cried in front of other people, something I do.not.do.  At that time, God was saying "I'm going to need you to relax." Except I was too busy flipping out to hear him.

He would be providing me a solution to a major problem that has been plaguing plauging plague-ing bothering me since August. Today, the situation was resolved for me, only this time, I could hear Him telling me to relax, and as more things came out, I can see that He was trying to take care of a problem for me and I just wasn't seeing how He was involved at all. I didn't have all the facts, and I was looking at the problem with a sense of "this is about me," when in fact, He was trying to tell me "I'll take care of this for you if you will let me, but it's not going to be easy, and you're going to have to put up with some crappy stuff, but I'll bring you out on the other side and you'll be fine."

He just needed me to relax.

And today, I finally did.