On My Day Off

First of all, let's not be silly. I couldn't take the whole day off. No no. I took the afternoon off. But I did see/witness/learn some very interesting and important lessons.

#1- When you go dress shopping for a dress you will be wearing to a wedding in which a very important ex-boyfriend will be attending, do not wear shorts and a t-shirt with flip flops and very little makeup. And do something with your hair. If you try on a dress while sporting the frizzy-hair, hastily-thrown-together makeup, you will look like crap, no matter how cute the dress is that you're trying on.

#2- When men roll their ankle, it's because they were coming down from a jump shot and landed wrong. When women roll their ankle, it's because they were standing on their tippy toes, trying to simulate high heels, and fell in the dressing room.

#3- When trying to help a very loud and discombobulated German woman, and her thin, pale, how-are-you-even-alive husband bumbling around behind her, you must be very specific...and, for Heaven's sake- she doesn't want to take the elevator!!

#4-I saw a girl wait for her boyfriend to go out in the rain to get her car and drive it up to the entrance to pick her up. He had to drive up a little further than she planned, I think because I was in the way, and she said "uh! I'm still getting WET!" I wanted to apologize to him and to slap her. I think that one of the reasons that men are not as chivalrous as they used to be is because of women like her. And women like me have to pay the price.

#5- Every Labor Day, I unpack all of my fall/winter clothes, and put away all of my summer/spring clothes. I discovered yesterday that I have 5 plastic bins of winter clothes, and 1.5 bins of summer/spring clothes. That's sad.

#6- I have 13 different sweatshirts and fleece pullovers. Each one is important to me for different reasons, reasons which prevent me from giving them away. Each year, I wear almost each one.

Oh...and I really really really really really don't like that stupid new song "Lips of an Angel"
Stupid.Stupid.Stupid