60 Years and Counting

I had dinner with my parents tonight. We were celebrating my stepdad's birthday. He's sixty. Fun little family trivia...my stepdad, sister, and I were all born in years ending in seven, so we'll all have the same number in the ones digit of our age. He turned sixty, I'm turning thirty, and Heather's turning twenty. Don't you feel like a smarter person, just for knowing that?

The thing is, most anyone has family issues. I have serious "are-you-SURE-I'm-not-adopted?" family issues. While my aunt-uncle-cousin family unit is exactly what every family unit should be in terms of closeness, supportiveness, and general familiness is, my immediate nuclear family is SO not. My family resembles the family from the movie The Wedding Date.

So, I took my parents out to dinner tonight because it was my stepdad's birthday, and it's what you do. Without going into great details, I always go into events like this with trepidation. See, my stepdad can be a real jacka#$. Seriously. And you never know when it's going to hit. So, I'm never sure if tonight will be the night I am going to have to go back into the restaurant under the guise of going to the restroom and apologize to some waitress or bartender (just fyi, yes, I did end up apologizing to the bartender).

Throughout the course of drinks and dinner, he said a few things that were totally off-base, and uncalled for, and someone really should shut him up about those things. But I've come to the point now that, although he's wrong...wrong, wrong, wrong...it's really not in the best interest of anyone to correct or confront him about them. I just smile and nod.

I had to come to the conclusion that sometimes, it's not about being right, and telling him he's wrong. It's about keeping the peace for the sake of a nice dinner. And all that junk from the past...he'll never admit he was wrong about that stuff, and it's okay. Because I've come to see that he may not be loving me in the best way, but he's loving me the best way he can, so I'll take it and forgive him for my sanity. And I'll be nice to him on his birthday...because it makes him happy, and it's not about me.