Friday, November 14, 2014

Prophet of BOOM

I'll have you know that I'm breaking my "no computer in bed" rule 
to bring you TWO POSTS IN TWO DAYS! 
(This one with GIFs!)

I'm still skating The Derby (roller, not Kentucky), 
and while my skills have advanced somewhat, 
I still look a little like this:

I'm in a new group, which is technically called Group 2,
but I prefer to call it Group 1 and a half, or Group 2ish.

Group 2 is exponentially better, because it does not revolve around 
safety falls. Meaning, we don't fall down and get up 
a hundred thousand times per practice. 

While Group 1 is all about safety and falling without injuring yourself,
Group 2 is all about building new skills. 
Like crossovers. They are not easy, 
and mine currently resemble this:
We still work on stops, which again, for me looks like this:
Our coaches/trainers like to teach us some fancy footwork 
and do drills that involve cones and weaving and bobbing and 
strategery and the likes. They calmly and clearly explain them to me. 
And I look at them like this:
But nonetheless, I get out there and try my hardest to 
wrap my brain around what they expect us to do. 
Which means I look a little like this:
Then, somehow, magically, I turn around mid-skating and don't fall
and don't flail my arms or injure myself, and I totally embrace the victory:
But the real kicker is that Group 2 is not just about skills. 
It's about this little personal hell concept called Endurance. 

We have to get our stamina up to achieve the magic numbers: 
Twenty-seven laps skated in five minutes. 
Do you know how long five minutes is on skates? 
It's a LONG A$$ TIME. 

Especially for someone who is not going to get to 
twenty-seven laps anytime soon. 
So, my goal is just getting better each time. 

The first time: 10 in about 2 1/2. Couldn't skate the whole time. 
Why? After ten laps, I was all:
As with many athletes, the problem is between my ears and not in my legs, 
so for my second time around, my goal was 11, and I got 15. 
Woo hoo! I increased 5 laps! 
And I didn't die. 

But I'm getting stronger now, and even wearing the sassier pants
(as Reckless would say) (Don't tell her they're just from Old Navy). 
During one hot streak of five practices without skipping one, 
I even made it to 19 laps in 5 minutes. 
That left me feeling like:
with a side dish of...
I've also started attending Saturday morning practices. 
Since I'm in group 2, I should probably go to practice 
at least two times a week. 
Saturday practices are hard. 
Getting up and at the rink and in 
gear and warming up by 9am? 
Then, we do drills. Footwork. 
And sometimes, that endurance hell I mentioned. 
Afterwards? For the rest of the day Saturday? 
This is about where I'm at:
   So, yeah. I'm still doing the derby, and loving every minute of it. 
The post title? That's my derby name. 
It was given to me by Reckless. 
I could not for the life of me come up with a name, 
but I didn't stress at all, knowing it would come to me. 

And it did. 
Reckless calls me Prophet 
(which I love, because if this whole derby things doesn't work out, 
I can start a small, fundamentalist cult)
My wife (Derby, not Sister) calls me BOOM. 
So I'm still working on that. 

There's one little problem with working on The Derby so much nowadays. 
The smell of my gear after practice:

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